Dreams – Poem

Is dreaming even practical? I ask; she looks at me with sad eyes

I don’t want to get tactical, plans so quickly turn to my demise

And if I had to get factual, I can’t trust myself to stay focused on the prize

Over-engineer, didactical, if I fail then my hope perverts into lies

She sighs, rolls over, turns away

Somehow I made dreaming a chore today

Only I could take something freeing, point out the confines

Prisoner of my own minds, don’t know other ways

Hope is a dangerous thing, that’s what Red says

The problem is I don’t trust myself, that much is clear

This is the cliche where I trace back to the beer

Put liquor on the shelf, to drown my fear

Previous failures coming back to life, reappear

Tired of the mistidings and negative assumption

She says I’m avoidant, that’s just how I function

Don’t want to burden with emotion, so I limit the gumption

That’s why I partook in overconsumption

So now I am unpacking, like a garage that’s been abandoned

Sweeping out cobwebs, my own propaganda, and

Ideas that this is how it is. Need to change my perspective, I understand and

Nothing’s been a failure, perfection I just demanded

Learning about goals, point yourself in a direction and forget it

As time goes down the road, progress naturally set in

Rome wasn’t build in a day, that’s the truth let it

Lighten your load. Journey not the destination – get in